In A Hurry

I was watching the rabbits swiftly make their way down the street the other day. It struck me as funny that they choose to use the road when they could have been making their way through the grass or even the footpath. Instead, they all stayed near the center of the road.

Perhaps they used the road for speed, or maybe because there are fewer obstacles on it. There are very few cars these days going down the street, that’s for sure.

I wondered where they headed to in such a hurry and if the road would take them all the way to their destination.

No one here is ever in a hurry. However, the same can not be said for the animals. The animals here run, hop, and gallop as if there is always something important to see or visit.

Is it because the animals are always in such a hurry that the people have taken a slower approach to life? Or perhaps it is because there isn’t much for people to see that they haven’t already seen at some point.
‘I’ve asked about this strange phenomenon, but no one seems to have an answer to this. Instead, people tell me that there is nothing to hurry for that won’t wait for you.

Profoundly Lost

Somewhere there are thousands of unmatched pairs of socks. Where they are, I don’t know. I can tell you that they have vanished somewhere between being placed in the dryer and when the dryer is finished.

I’ve checked the vents and the hoses, all to no avail. I’ve studied under the dryer in case I have dropped them, but nope. They have somehow vanished. Could they have gotten shrunk to the point that they became too tiny to see? Did they shrink enough to get stuck in the lint catcher, tossed out with the lint that they looked like?

I don’t know, but I can tell you that in the early hours, before the dawn is even starting, these questions and others come to visit me. In those moments are partial awakeness, I find my mind turns to try to solve the mysteries of the universe.

Foolishly, I had assumed the mysteries of the universe would deal with things like the path to happiness, black holes, the purpose of life, and so on. But no, it appears my role is to try and find why the socks go missing. I will leave the more important, more profound things to those who are better equipped I guess.


Beloved is the kind of man who is at home at the ballet, opera, or theater. I’d rather go to a concert, a bar, or a drive-in movie theater. He’s as comfortable in a suit as he is in casual clothing; I’m still trying to remind myself I’m too old to play dress-up when I wear “fancy” clothes that feel wrong.

He is fine dining and soft music to my casual hole-in-the-wall places with music that’s a bit too loud to hide any off-key singing.

He reads biographies and histories, whereas I will devour just about any written material I find.

He is cultured, refined, and efficiently uses his extensive vocabulary to make a point. I may possess the same type of vocabulary, but am less likely to use it, finding colorful language to better suit my passions.

Somehow so many years ago, these differences all seemed to fit neatly together, making things click and keeping us both on our toes. Even if it meant that sometimes Beloved had to break a few rules, or I had to wear something too stiff and uncomfortable. And why not if it brought a new adventure, something new to learn, and more tears of laughter than of sorrow?

Sometimes, as he is adjusting his tie, or speaking eloquently, I wonder how this all worked out and continues to work out. Not opposites, the two of us, but also not too similar, so I guess we found what we needed to make ourselves whole in each other.

Greatest Mysteries Of All Time

I’ve spent a large part of my career studying mysteries. Most of beliefs, disasters, healing and faith. Some of them I have come to understand, while others have eluded me. But there are mysteries that are well beyond my grasp.

The first mystery I cannot explain, and I suspect has been plaguing mankind for a long time, is the missing sock mystery. You know the one where you put two pairs of socks into the washer and when you toss them in the dryer, you assume they still are a pair? And yet when you pull them out, there is only one. I have looked everywhere for the missing sock, but never found it. I assume this type of mystery has been happening since the beginning of washing machines. Maybe even before. Perhaps it has happened since washboards or beating socks against rocks. Who knows!

Then there is the mystery of missing time. When you are bored or carrying out a task you dislike time seems to slow to a crawl. It takes forever for a minute to tick by. Yet when you are doing something you enjoy, the minute you start something time goes into warp speed and suddenly your time is up!

But perhaps the biggest mystery of all time is how can a dog know that you have bought a present for them when they aren’t with you? If you have a dog you know what I mean. You just step in the door and they know there is something waiting for them! Sure sometimes what you have may have a smell and we all know what they say about the noses of dogs, but sometimes what you buy doesn’t have a scent and still the dog knows you have something just for them. How does this happen? What do they possess that we don’t?

Like A Box Chocolates

Life is like a box of chocolates.  Nor because you don’t know what you are going to get until you put it in your mouth (let’s face it some of those boxes of chocolates come with legends so you know what you are eating), but because it starts off so full and somehow runs out before you realize it.

Heck my days are like boxes of chocolates and not because they as full but rather they start out with so much time, time which happily stretches on before me and yet before I know it the day is done. It’s a bit like eating the last chocolate in the box and you wonder where all of the other ones went.

Speaking of chocolates, I could use one or two of those little delights right about now.  Except I’d have to lose more time walking due to eating the chocolates.  And I really don’t want to lose time walking just for the sake of being able to eat a couple of chocolates!  Not that I have anything against walking, I enjoy that, but I also enjoy other things too so no chocolates for me just because I want one.  Or two, or three!

Of Floors And Magic

The floor can be a magical place when you are a young child.  When you are the parent of a young child you can rediscover the magic of textures to your floor and how everything is always right here besides.  Heck you can simply stretch out on the floor and sleep if you are so inclined or so exhausted.

But small children don’t stay small and the floor loses its magic to the mystery of furniture.  Of course as adults we don’t mind when the floor is no longer the play area.  It can be hard, after all, to get up off the floor when you reach a certain stage in life.  We breathe a sigh of relief when the floor is no longer play area and toy storage area because stepping on some of those toys is a whole new level of pain.  Most people will tell you, stepping on a Lego with bare feet is something that should only happen once in your life…if ever.

Now I don’t have children of mine own.  I do, however, have a tiny puppy who stays on the floor.  Her tiny toys are as bad or potentially worse than Lego.  You see she has a teething ball that has all these hard little nubbies for her to bit.  And well sometimes let’s just say her people don’t put the ball away before bed time.  Which means that of course when we have to go outside at one am her people will no doubt step on said hard bits of the ball.  So i get the Lego thing.  I really do.

And I’ve discovered crawling again.  Perhaps really not something I needed to discover because my knees sure as heck weren’t meant for this endeavour.  I’ve also discovered certain parts of the floor are more pleasing to me than others.  Basically the soft sections of the floor, also known as plush carpet.  I am not cut out for hard floors, not for sitting on them or resting on them.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I see a spot here on the floor we need missed vacuuming.  I need to call a crane to get me up so I can reach the vacuum….

Hopping With Surprise

The kangaroo decided to hide out in the bathroom.  Now frankly I’m not one for sharing my bathroom with others, and most certainly not a kangaroo.  But since the kangaroo was hiding  I didn’t really know I was sharing the bathroom.  So when the kangaroo hopped out from closet when I went to grab my towel I jumped back into the shelves and knocked over a series of bottles.

The kangaroo seemed rather blasé about the whole thing, however the dogs were most interested in the noise and the discovery of the kangaroo.  Although the spilled contents  of the bottles did sidetrack them for a few moments before the grabbed the helpless kangaroo and took off running and fighting of the soft, plus body.  They like taking turns squeaking the kangaroo and tossing her around the hallways.

How she ended in the closet I have no idea, the dogs aren’t able to open up the closet nor are they able to climb up where the kangaroo had been placed.  Now I know we don’t have elves or fairies in the house either.  I know because I tried to entice them to the house with food and comfortable places.  And they never once took the bait so hey clearly aren’t here.

The furniture has never been rearranged expect by humans so no poltergeists.  No chains rattling or sudden cold spots.  No strange figures just slightly there for you to see so we can rule out the idea of a ghost.  And since the kangaroo happens to be me of those stuff squeaky dog toys, there is no way for her (there is a baby stitched to her front) to have found her way into my bathroom closet.

I have no reason to hide a stuffed dog toy in my bathroom closet, not  among my fresh towels.  Besides the discovery of said creature created a massive mess for me to clean up.  And as much as I enjoy a good scare I could have done without the bruises.

So how did the toy end up in my closet?  Apparently one of the dogs dropped their toy in the clothes basket where the clean laundry is.  At some point the towels ended up in the closet and by how they were put on the shelf it was Beloved who put them away last time.  He never separated them to fold them so the missing kangaroo managed to stay missing for some time until the towel she was hidden in was required.

And this, my friends, has strengthened my rules about not sharing the bathroom.  Certainly not with stuffed kangaroo dog toys!

Planting Belief In Self Again

I recently received two gifts to cheer me up.  I appreciate them because they are unlike anything I’ve ever had before, however they also cause me stress.  You see friends I received a prayer plant and another plant called Moses In A Basket.

both plants are unusual to me and according to their papers, both are to care for.  They like shade and should it be watered when the soil feels dry.  Sounds easy, even for me.

So I found a nice place to put them followed the whole watering thing and they started to go a bit limp. The person who gave them to me refused to rescue the poor things, pointing out the orchid and African Violet’s have survived my almost black thumb.

Really it came to making a change, I could add more water or change their location.  Changing the location seemed the most likely and so I moved them into another room that had a bit more sun in it.  And the plants both perked up a bit.  Please don’t uncross your fingers yet…it’s still early days after all.. And least you forget, I’ve managed to kill all those impossible-to-kill type of plants I’ve received over my life.   I mean I e killed air plants for heaven sake!

Given the religious theme to these plants, I’m hoping my friend had them blessed and what have you so they’d have the strength to get through the test known as surviving me!  But I have hope, since the orchid and the violets are hanging in there.  And maybe that’s the real gift my friend gave me, the gift of strong hope and faith in me even when my self faith is lagging a bit.

What An Assignment Taught Me

IN my life I’ve had people who have come and gone; sometimes out of necessity and sometimes other reasons came into play.  Now and then I might stumble across a name that reminds me of one of those people and I may wonder whatever happened to the individual.  Typically this doesn’t happen often, I’m probably too self-absorbed or lost in school work.  At least that’s the story I’ve told myself.

But on my journey of finding my voice, my mission and such I’ve been asked to consider the people who have been in my life regardless of the  duration of our relationships.  This little assignment has proven to be anything but little.  In my personal experience this always seems to be the case.

And I will be honest about this, when I first started the writing assignment it was a half-hearted attempt on my part.  I just didn’t see the point to the assignment.  But I also didn’t want to take the shortcut method and miss something so I started listing names.  Slowly at first because well only half my heart was in it.

A strange thing happened as I was slowly putting down the names.  More names came to mind and I was written faster and faster.  I was trying to keep up with those names that popped into my head!  I also started to remember those people not just as named, but as people.  Smiling as I greeted each ne who came into my conscious again.

When I finished writing down the names and flipped to the next part of the assignment, I noticed my mood had shifted.  I was engaged, involved and in the to this assignment.  The second part of the assignment was to acknowledge the role each of these individuals filled in my life.

I found myself silently thankng these people as I wrote the second part of the assignment.  Not just a casual thank you either, but honest and true gratitude.  I may not have had the opportunity or the grace to thank each of these people in person.  I certainly didn’t have the love in me all the time to step forward and let these people know that I appreciated them for what they did as well as for who they were when they were present in my life.

While it isn’t exactly the same thing as personally thanking these people, in a way this assignment allowed me to do just that.  And this blog post?  It also provides me a forum to say thank you and appreciate each of these people again,a little more publicly.

so thank you to all, who were as well as those who are a part of my life.

P.S. You didn’t really think I’d have the space for listing all the amazing people I’ve been fortunate enough to know did you? 😉

P.P.S. The real lesson is what role gratitude plays in our life as well realizing each person in our life has something to share or teach us.

Violence Restrained And What Happens Next

Beloved went to visit his family, I stayed home because I wasn’t up for the trip and given my new treatment for lupus I  need to be careful around people who are sick.  One of his nieces was just getting over a cold so I didn’t feel it would be wise to risk it.

So while he went off to visit family, I attempted to work on my calm, peace and napping.  According to warden tracking device my attempts at peace and calm actually increase my work on focus.  And attempting to nap turns into activity apparently.  It could be that my warden is a bit confused or I’m confused at what these activities are supposed to be like.  Of course there is also a bit of, umm, what you may call contrarian behavior on my part!  Just a wee touch mind! 😉

While I was in my attempting to nap phase, (I wonder if I always had this idea with napping or did I just get anti-napping at some stage in life?), I received a text message from one of Beloved’s sisters.  The text started with “we had a great visit” and  then “he’s on his way home and we didn’t want to alarm you so…” (Pretty sure it’s stuff like this that doesn’t help in the napping department, or the calm if you get right down to it!)

after a brief period of nothing, a picture of Beloved came onto my screen.  Beloved with a swollen cheek and a black eye.  Beloved who looked as if he had been assaulted.  Because he had been.  By his almost sixteen year old nephew.  A nephew who has violent rages that are set off by just about anything.  Or so it seems to me because I don’t understand autism.  And the nephew has autism.

Now once upon a time, in a galaxy far far away, or was it a long long time ago…anyway at one stage in his life Beloved trained in boxing.  He also worked as a bouncer.  Just not in the same phase.  The boxing came first, the bouncing came later on.

The picture I saw looked like a man who never figured out how to move and doge.  Bobbing and weaving seem to have left Beloved’s skill set.  But when he came home, he assured me it wasn’t for lack of bobbing or weaving.  It happened when he and his brother-in-law were trying to restrain the violence.

Apparently at some point the nephew became frustrated and started throwing objects.  At people.  Thankfully the baseball teams aren’t beating a path to his doorway although I pretty sure the Speed his throws things at are impressive.  He just needs to work on accuracy, but no one is lining up to give him this skill.  That could become a deadly mistake.

After running out of items to throw, the boy decided that hitting, kicking and biting people were in order.  It was at this point, before blood was drawn or a successful bite landed in human flesh, Beloved and his brother-in-law moved to operation restraint.  Successful this time.  But at some point someone won’t be able to restrain him and then what?

What happens to the boy?  What happens to any one who gets in his way?  How do we protect him from himself and still protect everyone else without taking him away from opportunities and society?  He isn’t even fully grown yet.  Do the rages get stronger as his strength grows?  What happens if it gets out of hand?  If someone gets hurt, especially if someone who doesn’t neerstand him gets hurt…or worse?