Discovery Time

The four-footed one discovered where I keep her food.  Well okay she didn’t discover the location just now as the minute I started storing her food in that cupboard, she deemed it special.  She would sit in front the cupboard and gaze lovingly (my perception of if) at the door.  Willing it to open for her.

And then today, well today the cupboard wasn’t latched shut.  Just the slightest bit of it was open, and the four-footed one had all day to figure out how to use that slight opening to her advantage.  And by advantage I mean access to the contents of the cupboard.  Keep in mind this was for her own personal use, not to share, or just check in the inventory.

Somewhere along the lines, she managed to open the cupboard and get into the container where her food was.  Food that needed to be taken out of the container and placed on the floor. And not just one spot of the floor either.  You see if you drag the food container throughout the house you can get maximum floor space covered in food, so no matter where you go, you can find your food.  ;Been playing hard near the bathroom and in need of a tasty snack, no worries.  You have some food clustered just over there.

However, the problem with spreading stuff on the floor is of human nature.  You see if you have a human, that human will clean that mess up.  Putting all your precious food away and then making sure the cupboard is properly secured so you no longer have free access to all that loveliness.

If you are enterprising, like the four-footed one, you will discover other locations, such as where treats are stored.  Hey you have to keep trying because you just may make the discovery of the day, week or even month!


The Lady Does Protest

The four-footed is protesting. Not a full-out riot of one mind you. Just a well-versed protest. It started with her ignoring me whenever I called her. It then escalated to a full-on strike of sorts.

She decided she is not interested in her food anymore. It isn’t a case of not being hungry, or being on a hunger strike. Rather it’s just a case of she doesn’t like her food. At all. Probably because she got a taste of what we eat. Accidentally of course.

You see we had a lovely meal with rice. The problem with rice is that sometimes it doesn’t like to stay on my eating utensil. Sometimes when the rice falls off my utensil, it lands back on the plate. Other times it hits the tables. And then there are times I find myself wearing the stuff that has fallen so of course you know it also hits the floor.

And the floor is the four-footed one’s domain. She’s fast and determined and nothing hits her domain without her inspecting it. And by inspecting, I mean sticking it in her mouth. And eating it if it has a food value to it. So I suspect that this is where she got a taste for something other than her dogfood and decided that protesting would be the way to ensure she got more of what she wanted and less of her usual every day food. She’s probably bored by it to be honest.

I can’t blame her for being bored, she eats the same thing most times so a taste of something new is no doubt exotic. And once you taste it once you can’t help but want more if it! I get it. Except this type of a protest, especially the ignoring me, isn’t the way to go. Snuggling up to me and giving me affection with loads of tail wags will probably work better. Although she does that puppy dog eye thing so well. You know, the big sad eyes pleading for just a taste. Yeah that face. But it’s for her own good, only what’s for your own good doesn’t always taste good.

Say Cheese

Is it possible to have too much cheese?  I suppose it depends on who you are.  In my world the answer is no.  Beloved and I adore cheese and so the answer is a resounding no.  Throw in the four-footed one, although she has never actually had cheese, but she likes the smell of it.

Now it is possible to have too much cheese all at once.  As in you have so much cheese that if you ate cheese for every meal for several days you’d still not be able to make a dent in the cheese supply.  And I say this because we are currently at full cheese capacity.

Perhaps you’ve had this happen as well.  You buy cheese,you have people come over and they bring fruit and cheese platters and suddenly  you are at full cheese capacity.  So you come up with different ways to incorporate cheese in your meals.  You get creative.

Cheese becomes the go to for snacks, and is featured in several different ways for the same meal.  And still there is cheese to just eat just in your hand as cheese.  Because who doesn’t love that?  But if we get more cheese we may be in a state of excess!

Sleeping Dogs Indeed

While in the kitchen I dropped a slice of banana on the floor.  The four-footed one was faster g thing to the dropped fruit than I was.  She happily consumed the fallen slice and waited for more.

Large, hopeful eyes followed my every move as I sliced strawberries and a pear.  With no more items falling, probably her version of mana from heaven, she wandered off to flop on her current favorite spot on the floor.  She looked as if she was asleep by the time I brought my bow, of fruit to the table.

Looks can be deceiving. This I already knew, but she decided to remind me of  this anyway.  The phone rang and I got up to get it.  By the time I came back the four-footed one was in my bowl of fruit.  Eating out of it.  Not even using the spoon!

So much for leaving sleeping dogs where they are!  Because not all sleeping dogs are actually sleeping.  And some have apparently learned how to climb onto the kitchen chair in order to reach the food on the table.

And those eyes that were so large and hopeful earlier didn’t even hold the tiniest bit of shame.  Just love and a knowing look that she had gotten one up on me.  And my fruit.

Food, Torture And New Diets

A friend of Beloved’s was recently told to scale back on his dairy intake, reduce his sugar and avoid all things gluten.  Or as Beloved put it, he’s been told to starve.  Okay so that’s a bit drastic, but if you eat like Beloved and enjoy the food that Beloved enjoys, it could see, as though you’d starve.

You would think, based on Beloved’s response, that he was the one who was told to cut back.  You see if he could, Beloved would live off of potatoes and scones slathered in butter.  He would make a meal out of cake and buttercream.  Oh sure he’d have some meat and veggies, provided he could have cheese with that, however butter would be a common theme.  If he could, Beloved would have butter for all his meals and snacks.

And there is no denying that Beloved can have a sweet tooth that rivals the largest of sweet tooth around the world.

And now Beloved is trying to find a way to create a reduced dairy and sugar meal with no gluten.  So he can have his friend over for a meal.  Beloved is struggling with finding the recipes that will work and ones he still finds tasty too.  The two meals he made so far have been, well, less than stellar.  And let’s not even go near the desserts because not even the garbage was happy with his renditions.

Survival Boxing

Beloved’s sister has decided that we are once again dying for food, or at least he is dying for food from back home. Two large boxes were dropped off in the post today. Boxes that the mailman carried into my house, one at a time. Boxes that the mailman said were heavy. Boxes that said things like “fragile”, “this side up” and a long listing on the declaration from customs.

I’m pretty certain his family believes that if he doesn’t get food “smuggled” from home he will simply die. As if there is no other country that has food to sustain his health. Judging from the looks of Beloved, not to mention the way his buttons are on some of his shirts, I’d say he is amply sustained these days. (He went on a binge of trying new restaurants and insisted on tasting all their baked items at the same time. He has assured me the next binge he will go on is one called walking.)

I left the two boxes where the mailman had placed the, it was after all, as good a spot as any in the house. Beloved would no doubt open them up, remove the contents and then deal with the boxes once he got home, except the four-footed one was having none of this.

She is not the most patient of individuals in this house. But she lacks things called thumbs, which are crucial to opening boxes effectively. She settled for using something called teeth because she has a fair number of them. I figured the boxes would be safe because of how large they were.

I figured wrong though. Within a few minutes the four-footed one was spitting chewed up cardboard onto my carpet and she was proudly protecting the hole she had made in the first box. It wasn’t a large hole, but enough of one for her nose to wiggle into which allowed her to inhale all the different scents of food. Have you ever tried to keep a determined dog away from the source of delicious food scents? It isn’t easy!

That’s why the second box also ended up getting bitten before Beloved came home. I told him that the four-footed one was helping him by creating starter holes he could rip from. (He was not impressed with my logic.)

Thankfully the boxes have been dealt with, now if next time she could send some more storage space, like a whole other room…

Turn Up Your Nose At My Turnip

Don’t carve a pumpkin this year they said.  Pumpkins are so last year they declared.  Frankly I wasn’t going to carve pumpkin this year regardless of what anyone said.  And then, well then someone shouted that the turnip must be revisited.

You see in some countries where pumpkins didn’t grow, people carved the lowly turnip into grotesques.  Well actually some carved them into very real likenesses to human faces.  The color would be similar or at the very least nice and pale to represent the dead.

And so it came to be that I was more or pulled into a turnip carving class.  For the record I wasn’t really in the mood to attend the class. And for the record I have friends that try to get me out of my house so I cannot become a hermit.  (I’m okay with being a hermit, also for the record.  Or at least a recluse.)

Carving a turnip is not as easy as it sounds.  You must carve out the flesh to the very shapes you desire.  And no you don’t hollow out the center apparently.  At least that is according to the instructor who held up a very real looking human face captured mid-scream.  this face was complete with some teeth and a reddish shade painted into its mouth.

So I should probably fess up right now I, never going to create a human likeness regardless of whether I carve a turnip or sketch it on paper.  Mine is going to be more or less a loose interpretation of it, and you may just see the human aspect of it if you have really poor eyesight.  Or have been drinking adult beverages for a period of time before viewing my handiwork.

Thankfully the class was only for two hours and we weren’t really expected to produce much, just get started and finish our product on our own for Halloween.  So the fact I gashed and dug poorly into my turnip was to be expected.  But when we were leaving the instructor asked that we show him our work in progress. He commented on everyone’s.  My friend was told she had a nice start where as I was told that he could see I was trying different techniques.  This came after he looked down his nose at my turnip.

I think I shall leave this project unfinished and enjoy my turnip the way I always do, as a food.