One of Beloved’s oldest and dearest friends is getting married. The happy couple decided to write their own vows rather than have any of the honor, obey or sickness and health stuff. Instead they wanted something personal and meaningful to them as a couple.
They also wanted to avoid the whole topic of sickness and health because the groom has stage four cancer and said the last thing he needed or wanted was to be reminded that his life was going to be short. He wanted to celebrate his life, his love and the union he was forming with his amazing bride.
Beloved asked me, if I ever said yes to his question, how would I feel about the whole sickness and health line. Given I’m hardly a traditional girl and will never say to any question posed on a bended knee, he really has nothing to worry about. But the reality is I’d probably not have that line, or richer or poorer and such in any vows. They are empty words at the best of times.
At the worst of times, they serve as reminders to the cost people pay while they do this routine thing called living. I’d just as soon get on with the living stuff and not worry about the costs I pay on a daily basis. I manage to meet the bill, and so does Beloved, so who cares if one of us is sick or not? And it isn’t as if I’d be saying yes to his wallet anyway so richer or poorer in terms of finances is tacky.
But there won’t be vows said in front of people, or a white dress or a cake. I never could quite wrap my head around the need for all those trappings. Just the fact that we have each other is enough. The rest just seems like unnecessary stuff.