The leaves were dancing on the cool wind today. And so the four-footed one went dancing as well. Dancing after the leaves and perhaps as an effort to stay warm in the wind. I was along for the ride so to speak.
It was a complicated dance, changing pace and movements rapidly almost on a whim. The four-footed one seemed to understand the intricate steps as if she had been an understudy just waiting for the moment to step into the light. And in her moment in the light, she danced with passion and wild abandonment. To be honest I was a bit jealous of her, just a bit because I was also tired from the journey.
And like all individuals caught up in a passion, the four-footed one could not be denied her time. Nor the duration of the dance. She stopped only when the dance was finished or in our case the wind stopped dancing with the leaves. And when that moment came, the four-footed one sat down to rest. And refused to move another step, leaving me with two options: drag her home or carry her.
Obviously I carried her home, even though I was tired enough that I wondered what would take less energy.
My mama always insisted I make my bed once I woke up. She was deaf to the logic I applied, one that went something like this: why make it just to take it apart hours later to go to bed. The only time my mama allowed me to leave my bed unmade was if I were sick.
To this day, unless I am very sick, I make my bed once I get up. Beloved was raised them same way, only his Mama insisted his bed tucked in tight so a coin could be bounced off it.
No matter how hard we try, the four-footed one doesn’t seem to want to leave her beds nice and neat. I just spent the last half hour putting dog bed mattresses back into the beds, straightening blankets and such. Not because she has that many beds, but because once one bed was tidied up and I moved to the next, she tore the tided bed apart.
She grabbed one of her mattresses and decided to pull it into the bathroom. As if to say she might need to crash there at some time! It isn’t so much I want her to make her beds, but I’d like to not have to retrieve mattresses and such from various parts of the house.
The other day Belved found her mattress with his shoes. She carried it down five stairs and through a narrow doorway. Just to place it on his shoes. When he went to put it back she pounced on it and refused to let him remove it. (He was able to move it a few hours later, by that time she had another mattress somewhere else.)
And here is the kicker, she rarely sleeps or naps in her beds! Yep they become play things. Because she has our bed, and when she needs to nap there is either a welcoming lap or some feet to curl up on. Because she’s, well,our four-footed one!
Beloved decided he would fix up the garden all on his own. In one day. Because he got up early and looked out the window and decided that the garden needed to be fixed up. Of course Beloved also believes he still has the strength and stamina of an in shape twenty year old male.
Beloved has since been reminded that he isn’t twenty years old nor in excellent shape. Beloved has also been reminded that the garden is more work than he thought, especially for one day.
He woke up the next day barely able to move and not sure which part of his body was in more pain. So he opted to try and stretch out all the tight, sore spots. This did not work. Probably because his muscles were in knots. So he went for a massage. Followed by some stretching. Apparently his therapist was waiting for Beloved’s next attempt at doing too much al at once. In all fairness though most of us feel capable,of doing more than our bodies will let us. We don’t feel any older, weaker, sicker etc. We feel young and strong in our minds; we basically lie to ourselves. Until reality kicks in, typically in the form of pain from overdoing it.
The tomato plants have reached their end, the season is growing to a close, so I decided to pull them out today. The tomato plants had other ideas. Oh not about their season coming to and end. They just didn’t want to be removed from their pots.
Now I know some of you are thinking how can a tomato plant get in the way of its very removal. I don’t really know except to tell you that when I pulled it, it did not budge. Not even a little. So I dug out a shovel and tried to loosen it out of the soil. And that didn’t seem to do much of anything either.
A neighbor came by either taking pity on the plant or myself, I’m not sure which. He was made aware of my battle with this last tomato plant no doubt through my cursing of said plant. With a quick tug of his arm the whole plant gave up its grip in the soil. (My struggle may have pre-loosened it for him!). He also broke it down and put it in the garbage with no problem whatsoever.
He told me some beings will clung to the very last bits of life, even when it knows the time has come, just in case. Because, as my neighbor said with a knowing grin, the weather always changes and hope rides in on even mildly warmer air. And as long as there is hope, there is a need to cling to life as long as you can. I’m not sure if he was talking about the tomato plant or my health.
At any rate, I do believe plants always have the upper hand when t comes to me.
Today: Squash, Pumpkin the sign proclaimed as the car drove by the neatly lettered black sign with a cheerfully sketched pumpkin at bottom. A nice drive out in the country is what Beloved had in mind so we were on some back roads enjoying the sights and sounds of the rural areas.
We weren’t in a hurry and no specific destination in mind when we set out. We simply gathered up items and the four-footed one and headed out to the car. Beloved opted to drive and I was content to simply belong for the ride.
We stopped to let the four-footed one stretch all four of her legs. We stopped for Beloved to take pictures of the landscape. We stopped to listen to the cows and horses in the fields. We stopped when a small animal darted across the road in front of us. And we stopped to visit the squash and pumpkins.
Actually we initially stopped because Beloved was in the midst of being awestruck by the landscape, scenery and red barn that was just off to the left of the road. He had just started to drive on when he noticed the sign and decided we should stop for squash and pumpkin. Although to be honest part of me suspects he wanted to tell the people squash and pumpkin is all the same.
We slowly drive up a long, gravel and mud filled drive, past some goats and a few cows. We stopped at bit back from a shed of some type and Beloved clipped the four-footed one onto her leash. He reasoned that she needed to stretch again and what dog wouldn’t want to check out a farm.
After a tea with the lovely older couple who own the farm, three types of squash and two small pumpkins we headed for home. The four-footed one did not enjoy the farm as per say because like myself she is a city being. She is, however, fascinated with the produce we brought home. And while I rest up from today’s little trip, Beloved is eyeballs deep in recipes to try with his “lovely” find!
It’s easy to lose sight of things. It’s easy to be caught up in details and apply that tunnel vision to everything. There times this is a good thing, and then there are times that we miss out on so much because we simply didn’t allow ourselves to look further afield, check out what’s happening on the sidelines or take in the whole horizon.
If we only glance up occasionally, if we only shift our focus for the briefest of moments, it is easy to not see everything. At times what we miss might just be an entertaining moments, or every day things. Nothing major.
But now and then, every once and awhile we will encounter an experience where perhaps if we just paid a little more attention to things, we may have been there for something big. The problem is no one knows when those moments happen.
Now I am not saying I would have made a difference to the outcome, but perhaps if I had spent a little less time with my head buried in my own work I may have noticed when a colleague changed. I’m not talking hairstyles either. A group of my coworkers and I all wondered this very thing. If each one of us had taken a little more time out of our own worlds perhaps the one coworker could have felt as if he could reach out. Instead, for whatever reason, he felt the easiest way to cope was to end his own life.
If each of us shifted our focus a little, if we all stopped getting stuck in those small details we might be able to be there for someone when one of those moments comes up in their lives. And maybe, just maybe we’d be a little more connected and aware.
Today I learned how much I rely on my eyesight. I had assumed I would know my way around my house, I mean I can find my way through it on a dark night. So why did I struggle trying to find my way through my house on a sunshine filled day?
Well for starters despite the sunshine streaming into my house, it could have pitch black. You see at my eye exam the lovely optometrist ran some tests which required all sorts of amazing eye drops. And those eye drops were designed for specific tests, not for carrying out daily tasks in bright light.
Some how among the eye drops going in (not a pleasant experience for me), the side effects of the drops, the tests and of course my stress I managed to work myself into a state of being unable to not only see, but also make sense out of where I was.
They had warned me, the test would render me unable to see in bright light or look at backlit things such as my electronic devices for a few hours. I was prepared for that and even had lovely dark glasses with me.
What I wasn’t prepared for was how my fear and stress would alter my rational mind to the point I couldn’t find my way through my own house. And while I wait for the rests, I’m sure the stress, anxiety and fear will continue to alter my rational thought process. But I am also sure I can find a way to occupy some of my thoughts for some of the time.
Until the results come in!