No doubt you have probably received numerous letters from people like me, you know the ones who didn’t ask you to become involved in our lives, but you did anyway? I wonder if you read those letters and get it. I wonder if you realize that while none of us invited you into our lives, each and every one of us will prevent you from fully taking over our lives.
I feel for you though Lupus. I really do. I am sure you are the target of some harsh thoughts; hate has been sent your way and no doubt hurtful things said about you. I cannot imagine what it must feel like to know that there are so many people wanting to be cured, wanting you basically to be killed. And to know there are people working on the strategy to be your demise, well that cannot be comfortable at all can it?
I’m not sure why you were chosen to be the one to inflict the autoimmune responses the way you do. Did you draw a straw and get the superpower that lets you turn my immune system into overdrive? Do you win extra points or status the more damage you do to my body?
Are you must misunderstood and looking for attention? Did something happen in your past? Or is this just your nature? Not that any of it matter, because no matter how you answer those questions know this, you may make my life challenging and cause complications that I really don’t need or want, but at the end of the day I will still be what I want to be and who I want to be, even if it means a more round about journey must be taken to get there. And I will not let you carry out your work unchallenged. Because despite the fact that I did not invite you, you have come into my life so you have to deal with my terms as best I can put them into play.
I wish you no ill will (pun intended) at the end of the day; I just wish you could find your own body and stop using mine to test out your strength and powers. Until you do you and I shall dance. Sometimes you will lead and I will fight you as I follow and other times I shall lead and change things up. I guess you should know I’m not really good about waiting my turn either so anticipate on doing a lot more following because I have issues following rules and calling the shots.
Me and my painful, tired, still fighting body