Something’s A Little Off

I’ve been feeling a bit “off” again.  Or is that the off is on again?  It’s all rather confusing, but that’s life with a chronic illness such as lupus.  You can be zipping along managing to be “normal” and then Bam!  You hit a wall. A wall of exhaustion.  A wall of no can do at this moment.

I’m not exactly at the hitting the wall point just yet.  It’s more of the warning stage.  The stage that basically says if you don’t heed this warning bad things will come.  Bad things as   in not able t get out of bed bad thing.  And bad things as in no energy at all to do anything and incredible pain that doesn’t seem to end.

I will be the first person to admit that far too often I try to push past this stage.  I try to be a type of super hero and be immune to this.  Alas, I’m not immune to my own messed up immune system.  Rather I’m supposed to manage a gentle and delicate balancing act with my hyperactive  immune system.  Let’s just say I have yet to get and keep balance!

Id like to think that as I get more mature I get a little smarter than before.  Meaning that I can now notice that I feel “off”.  If I am wise, then I will heed the warning  and ward off the worst of an intense flare.  Well friends, I’m old enough to know better and still young enough to do the opposite of what I should.  But I have a secret weapon in my life-my support team who are getting better at not letting me push beyond this stage.  For this I am grateful.

How about you?  Are you feeling a little off?


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