The Great Starvation or How To Lose Weight By Losing Your Mind

“I’m starving” he announced as he threw his bag on the nearest chair.  “I am going to faint from lack of sustenance. I will die from malnourishment because I’m starving” he declared as he strode into the kitchen.

When I failed to acknowledge his state of starvation, he mentioned the horrible hunger pains he had.  He talked about a headache and some other stuff.  I wasn’t really listening because he was hard to hear over my crunchy of an apple.

Now obviously Beloved isn’t really starving.  He does understand what it is to lack  food that is in abundance for that was a constant in his childhood.  He grew up on small bits of food that might amount to snack in my world.  At the worst, he lived on one piece of toast for a whole day.

But Beloved is a man given to his own internal dramas so when he decided he simply needed to drop some weight he rushed into a no sugar, no carb, no gluten type diet.  Basically he moved to eating fruits and veggies and a small amount of protein.

The problem is he isn’t a hug fan of a lot of veggies.  And the ones he likes, he gets bored with easily.  You can same th same, to a slightly lesser degree when it comes to fruit.  So day two of the self-imposed rules of eating lead him to make proclamations of the great starvation of 2016.

I pushed over a bowl of grapes, only to be met with “I’m starving woman.  I need food, solid food” and a scowl to outdo most scowls as he started lifting lids to my pots which were cooking my food. You know the kind with gluten in it and some sugar.  Because well I see that I could strand to lose some pounds, I also see no need to starve myself in the hopes it will vanish overnight.  The only thing that vanishes overnight on these types of diets is your sense of reason and sanity.

Who knows, maybe tomorrow he will declare carbs to be added back to his diet.  If not I may I may move out for a bit.  For my sanity.

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