I’m not bragging, but NASA has our number on speed dial. I know, it takes some getting used to, but it’s for an important reason. You see when we get glorious “hot”, sunny days, we try to enjoy it.
And by enjoy it I mean we go outside. Sometimes with bare legs and arms. Sometimes we even go out on a friend’s boat, at which boat now and then Beloved has been known to take off his shirt. And that’s when NASA comes in.
You see Beloved has alabaster son. Well okay it isn’t made out of alabaster, but he is incredibly pale. We’ve lost him a few times in a snowstorm! So when you get pale, almost luminous white skin bent hit by the sun it can be blinding. Add the water reflectng the brilliant sun rays as well and clearly you have created a safety issue for astronauts.
Tofay was one of those days and Beloved couldn’t result the call of the waves. Board shorts, a t-shirt and flip flops were on the appropriate attire list for board the boat. Since I wasn’t up for all that brilliance I stayed home with the puppy.
Which means I took the call from NASA. “Ma’am, we have a problem,” the voice said in a lilting southern accent. “The glare coming back from your partner’s body is a bit much. The astronauts missed an important sighting because they couldn’t see past the glare of the sun on pale man-flash aboard a vessel on the water. Please advise your partner and his friends to put their shirts on. We are doing important work. Thank you and have a nice day.” And then they hung up.
Now I meant to call Beloved, but the puppy required my attention. And then I forgot. Until a lobster came through my door. The lobster had been thoughtfully cooked, dressed in Beloved’s board shorts and saying a shirt was too painful. Upon his crustacean feet were Beloved’s flip-flops.
The puppy was having none of this creature in our house. Until the creature spoke to the puppy in Beloved’s voice. And I remebered, so I told him “NASA called. Again. An important sighting was missed because of you and your mates.”
He shrugged his briallant red shoulders and headed off for a cool shower. By the time evening comes around he won’t be a lobster anymore. He will be a potential threat to NASA once more!