How much is too much when it comes to discussing your health resulted issues with people? Do you hold back the more embarrassing things, even though we are all human and have embarrassing things? Do you carefully edit yourself least you offend someone? Do you tone down certain aspects so loved ones don’t worry?
We all have our own reasons for how we tell our stories to the various people in our lives. Some of us may share different degrees of our stories with the different individuals in our lives. I personally work from a place of the closer someone is to me, the more I may share. But I confess there are certain aspects with living with lupus that I keep very close to myself. I share just tiny bits of this information with only the closest people.
One of my friends has a very different approach with her chronic illness, multiple sclerosis. She has decided to share it all from the mundane to the embarrassing. She has decided not to spare loved ones from her pain, suffering or struggle. She recently shared that she was having issues controlling her bowels. Granted she spelled it out for us in graphic detail rather than how I phrased it and seemed surprised that someone was offended by her language and description.
Now life is messy just living it without a chronic illness. When you have a chronic illness like lupus or MS life is far messier. Life with a chronic illness has bigger messes, the type that are harder to clean up. I tend to try to hide the messiness of lupus and throw a little something on to disguise that which I can’t hide. I’m not sure that I’m foo,ing anyone, other than myself, but I do it just in case.
After talking with my friend I wonder how many of us would have the courage to use brutal honesty and lay everything out for all to see? I wonder if there is such a thing as too much honesty or too much bluntness when it comes to chronic illness and how it impacts a person’s life. Or do we do a disservice when to others who have the same chronic illnesses we do when we try to down play how it affects our lives? How much do you share and how do you decide?