Roaring Silence

The sound was amazingly loud.  This is not what I had expected at all.  The sound of so many beating wings overhead was almost deafening.  I hadn’t counted on that.  I had expected then all of the birds to be louder than the wings and yet now that I was sitting out in the middle of nowhere at dusk I was learning just how wrong I was.

In my defense, I’ve spent the bulk of my life in cities.  I tend to be more comfortable in the forest of concrete  and glass than those made of trees and grass.  The problem with that is the sounds im most familiar with are the honks of cars,  not geese.  I’m used to the chirps of cells phones and traffic signals, not the chirps of grasshopper, crickets and birds.  Running water?  Sure if you consider rain rushing down the gutter. I know it isn’t as lovely as a waterfall or babbling brook.

so now at I was sitting out in a field surrounded by nature I was learning just how silent it could be one minute and how loud the sound of hundreds of beating wings could be he next.

We had come out here because she suggested it would help me get in touch with mindfulness.  She said that the city, with all of its hustle, noise and distractions, prevented people from being able to have peaceful mindfulness.

this had all come about when I confessed to her that I was unable to meditate.  I had explained that when I tried to simply be, to enjoy the being still my mind rebelled.  Ideas, theories, questions and such would immediately fill any stillness.  My mind doesn’t like to just be still, to settle into a relaxed state.

initially she had given me some exercises to try, such as counting off as each thought popped into my head, but then I felt a need to fixate on the numbers, and thus it was a losing cause.  She suggested I just try to say “I’m sitting in peace and stillness” each time a thought or interruption happened, but I found myself focusing on needing to say these words in my mind.  I wondered if there was a way I was supposed to say it; if there was a magic tone or such.

So she had brought me out to the where we were sitting.  After trying to guide me into stillness, she suggested we just sit and let nature wash over us.  I assume by that she meant to let the bugs walk on us if the wind sent them in our direction.  This isn’t exactly a comfortable thing for me.  Thankfully they didn’t seem to like me! 😊

so does sitting out in a field listening to a massive flock of birds flap their wings bring one to am rate of peace and mindfulness?  I can’t say for sure what it does for anyone other than myself.  And in my case, it created a sense of awe and wonder, but not peace or mindfulness.  Still I must say it wasn’t a trip wasted for I learned about the intense noise and silence found in nature.😊

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