When I was young, I hated going to bed. Having to go to bed while the night was still going on without me seemed a cruel torture. Sure I needed sleep, sure I needed rest, but still it all seemed so wrong especially since adults got to stay up and do all sorts of adventurous things.
As I got older I still fought this notion of sleep. Oh sure I got enough, but it wasn’t an 8 hour sleep, more like 5. I guess I became a bit of an expert at stretching out “just five more minutes,” into hours.
Some people will say his is insanity, that sleep is restorative and healing, especially if you have a chronic illness like lupus. The is, if it’s lupus you are exhausted all the time anyway, no energy no nothing. I figure it’s kind of greater payback for me not taking sleep or rest so seriously before.
Now my body demands that I slow down, that I cease stretching those 5 minutes out so far. And now I have other people, people who love me and care about me beyond my biological family, reminding me that I need to rest.
There is a part of me that still, even with the bone tired exhaustion of lupus, wants to push back, stay awake and not miss a thing, after all rest will come when im dead. And a dear friend reminds me all the time that my death cannot happens or a long time, that there is need for me to be in this friend’s life. ☺️
So I am begging you to supply me with the titles of some good bedtime reading. In an efforts of help me not avoid rest so much! I figure I will start like you do with a child, a bedtime story before it’s lights out.😉