Dressing Disaster

Dresses and robes seem rather impractical when you get down to it.

From a construction perspective I’m sure they are easier to make than say a pair of pants. And sure on a hot day it might be nice to have a breeze wafting around your legs and ankles, but it also means it will billow out your dress or robe.

Try climbing a tree in a dress or robe and let the hilarity commence. You are resist cited by how far the material will stretch as you try to get your leg onto a decent foot hold. Sure you can adjust the material, pull the skirt portion of it up higher if you wish, but then you have a material management issue.

I’ve never been good at this material management portion of wearing dresses. The truth is I learned at an early age dresses aren’t made for me. I was playing tag while wearing a dress and the dress just kept getting in the way. I figured I could hoist my skirt a little higher as they say. And well two things happened, first off I hoisted a bit too high and secondly what does one do with that wad of material one’s hand as one is trying to play tag.

After that I retired my dress wearing days, well until I got older and it was a special occasion. And even then, why should I have to throw on a dress or skirt when pants are simply more practical and can be just as fancy?

Beloved, who enjoys black tie affairs, cannot understand the hatred I have for these events. It starts with the whole wearing of a dress and heels and ends with all these people wearing false masks and behaving falsely. Ah but that is another story.

Never thought I’d be wearing a robe, never considered it and then suddenly I was. Wearing a robe while presiding over a group of people. The problem with the robe is the whole skirts bottom bit, sure it makes for a lovely image of gliding while one walks, but still. Also robes some times are more billowing than dresses and thus it was the case for me. My robe allowed me to become an intern for the flaming sleeve as I was lighting candles. Besides burning my sleeves I also managed to trip on the hem of my skirted robe.

Perhaps I’m just not meant for dresses and robes. Maybe the is no changing from being a jeans and cotton shirt kind of girl into a dress wearing girl.

Smart Phone = Stupid Me

There was a time in my life when I could remember things besides dates, names and other bits for school.

There was a time when I could rattle off the phone numbers and street addresses of friends and family.

There was a time when I could remember appointments and meetings without having to worry about it.

To be safe, just in case, I would write stuff down. By hand. In a day planner. Some of you may even remember these things.

But then I got a smart phone. How smart is the phone? It’s so smart I look like an idiot. Ask me a phone number of a close friend and I need to check my contacts/phone book. Ask me the address of a friend, and I’m still checking that information out.

I now consult my phone to find my grocery list, books I want to buy, items that have caught Beloved’s eye, and all those pesky appointments and meetings one needs to keep track of.

If I don’t have my smartphone I become a dummy. Surely I’m not alone in this.

Meant To

I meant to water the plants, honest I really did. It’s just that I got busy with other things.

I meant to do the load of laundry, honestly I did. I got side tracked somehow.

I meant to pull food to of the freezer to cook, it crossed my mind a million times. It just happens that each time it crossed my mind I was occupied doing something else.

I’d love to say this is a rare day, that normally I accomplish what I tell myself I’m going to do. The truth is that this is common. I also forget to do something, or find that there isn’t enough time to get to everything on my list.

Even with a shorter list I would probably have this issue. The truth is, there are times my mind is like a hummingbird, busy flitting from one flower to another, a million thoughts keeping up with a million beats of the wings.

The annoying thing is Beloved seems to have a built-in sense when he is about to forget something, such as pulling food out of the freezer. It isn’t that the man doesn’t forget things because trust me he does. It just seems stuff like laundry, food, plants, grocery shopping and such never slip his mind.

I’m not really complaining either, so much as shinning that it seems a bit unfair. And it’s during my mid-whine that I’m reminded of a few things: it isn’t a competition, we are there to complement each other, we are help mates.

Coincidence or….

His feet were up on the table as he leaned back in the chair, a book on his lap, open to a page he was reading. Reading with his eyes closed mind you.

He looked so sweet, so innocent, so unlike himself when he is awake and all full of mischievous ideas and a wicked gleam in those eyes of his.

The angel, resting on one of my shoulders advised me to leave him sleep and catch upon his rest. The devil, dancing on my other shoulder insisted that I wake him up, with a loud bang of some sort. Oh the decisions I sometimes have to make! 🙂

In the end, I didn’t have to make the decision because the sleeping beauty moved and dropped his book on the floor. The noise woke him up, and the dog too.

When I confessed my temptation to him, he asked me if I thought it was a coincidence or if it were something greater at play. Something that I couldn’t place my finger on exactly.

In the end I decided it was just that a coincidence where everything just lined up thusly making it seem something more than it was. What do you think? Ever one of those moments?

Devices

I know people who cannot function without their cellphones or tablets. These little electronic devices have insinuated themselves so easily into our lives until we haven’t even noticed it.

I’d like to say I’m not in this group, and to a degree that is true. The truth is though, I notice when I’ve left my cellphone at home, or when the battery charge has run out. It isn’t a moment of panic or anxiety for me, but I definitely know that something is missing. Something feels a little wrong on those days.

So when I recently given a wedding invitation that clearly specified no cellphones allowed, not even on silent modem I was amused. I knew some of the people who had been invited and I know that they cannot live without their electronic gadgets. How one earth will they make it through the wedding I wondered.

Hoe did we manage before these devices were in our lives? How on earth did we even allow them to get so cozy with us and become so important? Was it and is it a wise thing? How many other weddings are going the way of device free?

Labeling Fashion

I’ve been betrayed, betrayed in the worst possible way. (Not that there is a good way to be betrayed really, but some betrayals hurt worse and wound deeper than others.)

The day started off innocently enough, not a hint of the storm brewing in the not-so distant future. Not even the faintest, wisp of a cloud marred the bright blue sky. And so I started my day off rather happy and completely unsuspecting of the trauma awaiting me.

innocence filled my getting ready routine, simple and comfortable conversation as I got myself ready to face the world. The morning gave way to an even brighter afternoon, still filled with innocence and my.

It was around dusk, while out shopping with a friend that the horrible deed, the betrayal most awful took place. Like all well laid plans, all schemes hatched to perfection this betrayal took place at just the right moment, in this case as I was reaching for my cup of coffee.

I felt it then, that sharp searing pain of a deep scratch. The initial moment where I couldn’t place what had happened. It was only as I set my coffee cup back down and felt another deep jab, that I realized what had happened. My favorite bra had attacked me, betrayed my trust and my unsuspecting flesh.

It isn’t that I show a great deal of favoritism to this bra, although I do rather like how it looks and feels a bit more than my other bras. I treat them all the same though, so there should have been any need for jealousy or bullying amongst my bras. I mean we are talking bits of lace and what have you. But oh those underwires! One had popped out and stabbed me before returning itself back to innocent and charming favorite. Only now I was suspicious of it, what on earth could it do next?

Beloved, upon hearing of this attack had one of his own, the laughing kind. But of course what was I expecting, sympathy from a man who has no clue what it’s like. No clue at all to know the hunt for the perfect bra, the one that feels perfect and does all the things it is supposed to do and be cute and fashionable too. Bit no, not him. To him it is just an item of clothing.

May his favorite jeans betray him, and may a zipper be involved. Just enough to know the fact that clothing isn’t innocent, nor is it without risk and danger. Perhaps soon our clothing will carry other labels, not just fashion labels, but warning ones. “Caution, zipper may entrap flesh”, for example. Oh yes indeed the price we pay for fashion!

Enough Not Enough

It always seems like there is just never enough money for everything. Something comes up or the price of something changes and once again I wonder where all the money goes.

It isn’t that Beloved or I do not make decent money, we do. It just seems that the cost of living and heat have you goes up more than salaries and such.

I was talking to a dear friend about this recently and he pointed out there are a myriad of ways to make money out there. Lottery, which seems to not be our thing as it requires luck and all our luck is of e unlucky variety. Online businesses and such that let you do what you love doing and making money. (Except what I love doing isn’t likely to make me a lot of money. Pretty sure there aren’t jobs out there that pay well to read books and the like.) And the list goes on.

I cannot imagine how people who aren’t making much money get through life, not with the way prices are inflated and such. Sure I know that some of the stuff isn’t necessary and here are many things people want, but do not need. Still there are folks who have to do without the basics. And at the same times there are people who have money to simply spend as they desire.

There must be some answer to this problem and maybe it does exist on the internet. But I don’t think it means we all get to do exactly what we want and still make money hand over fist. I’m not even sure we are supposed to make money hand over fist just because we can.